Footprints On The Sands Of Time

So, I finally sit down and write my first dissertation. One, because I don’t feel like studying(not afraid of the impending sessionals) ; two, because I have nothing better to do on this Valentine’s eve(as evident, the writer is single); three, because I am out of practice writing stuffs for over three years(except for those futile,exasperating blabberings that I email my crush and some maudlin FB posts every now and then).

There are these random musings that keep passing my mind. Since, there are so many things going on with me, evidently I have no time thinking about anyone else, so I keep judging myself. The roads I have taken so far, the choices I have made. I never blame my circumstances, they have always been favourable. It’s been just me, who has to have the answer, a progress report. No, no, the end of the year hasn’t arrived, yet I feel the need every now and then to keep a check on myself, to keep myself from going astray, as I am a person very likely to hop from one thing to another. I work on instincts, there is a thought in my mind and next moment I am doing it, no second thoughts, nothing. Life has never been easy, simple but never easy, especially if you have a mind which would never batten down its jabberings.

So I have an encounter with myself. I see myself two years ago, and now. How much I have changed! There was this fat girl(who is still a butterball by the way) with dreams, big dreams, having no plans whatsoever how to achieve them, yet all armoured with belief, to enter the battlefield. Then reality struck. How could an unexperienced sailor, a novice navigate and reach his destination without acquainting himself with the wrath of sea. A milestone to the dream, I failed to achieve. And ever since then, I’ve failed, always, everywhere. And then suddenly…. suddenly I realise how depressing this writing has become. So I swap roles. Obviously you are not interested in knowing what I have been through, you are already fighting your own war! Let me then not mourn about it and help you get charged and move towards  your intent.

Ever heard the story of a bumblebee? The pseudoscience argument of Aerodynamics states that a bumblebee cannot fly as it does not have the required capacity (in terms of wing area or flapping speed). Ignorantly defying all the laws of sane world, a bumblebee flies! A man is fettered in his own limitations. Education teaches us what we can do, and wistfully also what we cannot. When we don’t know our limitations, we go out and astound ourselves. In hindsight, we wonder if we had any limitations. The only constraint a person has are those that are self-imposed.

Follow your most intense obsessions MERCILESSLY. Breathe in them. A strong, passionate, pulsating desire will fetch you whatever you want. Do not forget to put hardwork in between. Its a tmesis, you forget to put it somewhere and the entire meaning changes to something else.

“It’s a force that appears to be negative, but actually shows you how to realize your Personal Legend. It prepares your spirit and your will, because there is one great truth on this planet: whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you really want something, it’s because that desire originated in the soul of the universe. It’s your mission on earth.”

I’m no philosopher but I believe we are all heroes! All of us. Nobody could ever live our life better than we did. I make a point, not to blame anyone for whatever happens in my life. “I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul”.

So, take charge, get over the bars. Awake, arise, aspire. Shine. Shine, for thou art the sun!

“Lives of great men all remind us

We can make our lives sublime,

And, departing, leave behind us

Footprints on the sands of time”

Purpose of life

My father once told me that every man must have a purpose in life. My parents and relatives always lecture me to study and work hard for my future. The meaning of better future to them is to get married and earn money. And that is the purpose and goal they want for me to have in life. And then there are religious people who talk about salvation and reincarnation. But I dont agree. So, what’s the real purpose of life or is there none?
What if it’s true that there is no real purpose in life and we are just working too hard to find one? I guess that finding a true purpose is life we creating for ourselves.
I read this quote once “we live alone, we die alone… everything else is just an illusion”. It’s stuck into my head. Sometimes I feel why study, work and sweat if there is no real purpose and meaning in life, for just an illusion. My friend once said to me life is a journey. I thought if it is a journey then what is our destination, death, salvation or reincarnation. I wonder maybe humanity just create these fancy notions of salvation to counter its fear of death.
About 55 million people die every year, which means about 1,50,000 per day. So what if death is the ultimate truth and nothing else. Then what’s the point of all this struggle and fight in life? People always say that one should stop thinking about death and enjoy the moment, sometimes it seems like a better idea but suddenly a thought comes echoing in my mind that maybe it’s all a lie and you cannot outrun your fate (death). May be death is the only truth and no amount of friends or money or a girl for that matter, can help me avoid my fate.

Ishant Rana
MAIT New Delhi

I….Have a Secret!

Have you ever felt like you are wasting your time, while others are busy learning new things. Or afraid that people around you know more about things, than you? 

Let me tell you a secret.

I get scared sometimes. Awed by the things people are doing around me, awed by how far ahead they already are and that I will never catch up to them.

I look at a friend who is doing something in the Army and I think, that guy is doing something worthy. He wears the national colors, medals, badges and will make his parents proud. Being an army man, he is much superior to me in the physical front, can jog/sprint/run thirty times more than I can. Then I look upon myself and feel, “What am I doing!”

I look at another friend who goes to all these big debating competitions. He may not be winning, but he sure as hell has got the confidence to speak in front of a large audience! He knows about what’s happening in the world scene, the politics, wars, treaties and shit. And me? Hell I don’t even know the mayor’s name!

Another friend reads a lot, has all those big theories in his head I don’t even know a word about. Has even started watching movies in languages other than English now. And I stand nowhere.

But does this really mean that I am missing out?

I found out that this thing can also be categorized under peer pressure. And this goes on to show that peer pressure is not only limited to starting smoking, drugs and all, but it covers this situation too!

My father taught me something when i was in class 6th or 7th, “Son, when in doubt, do a SWAT analysis.” It stands for:

S – Strength

W – Weaknesses

A – Achievements

T – Threats.

Jot down your strong and weak points, what you have achieved and what problems you can face in achieving your new goals. This gives you an overview of the situation. This has helped me develop a logical mindset and given me the ability to change my outlook according to the conclusion I draw from all those healing sessions I have with myself (yes of course on the toilet seat!).

And now about this awed thing, I thought and thought and concluded. No I am not missing out. I am just not like anybody around me. I have a different skill set. I have my own unique strengths. I find communication easy. I am good at making friends. I may be bad with names and dates, but I am daft at making people feel light. This conclusion was made with the help of the same smart-ass friend who would now be sitting in his room, eyes glued to his laptop screen, earphones plugged, watching some Urdu/French/German/Gujrati movie.

The solution is not to feel inferior, but to know our weaknesses and our goals. And then assess what all skills we need to do better in our chosen field. Repeat this cycle every time you feel intimidated, and one day you will finally stop feeling so (unless of course you hang out with Stephen Hawkins).

Bottom Line. Don’t be awed. Be inspired.  

 

Happy New Year!

Somethings never change. However hard you try, you are still the lazy ass you were years ago. Making new resolutions every year, only to break them in the coming days.

But this year I was very adamant. I thought I had to do something. I had to grow. Our exams got over on 3rd Jan and that’s the date I had decided for my New Year to begin. Like every year, the plan included getting slim, learning something new (language, programming skills, some sport) and doing better in the academic front. The year 2014 was no different. I felt the same urge to look, sound and behave smarter.

But this time, equipped with the knowledge as to how unification of every phenomenon is the final goal, I unified all my resolutions into one. I HAD TO GROW.

I had to get fit. I had to learn JAVA. I had to get myself a good internship. And I had to get 80% above in  my college. I decided not to waste my time in watching movies and serials.

I have fallen into a lot of retrospection in my free time and this kind of stuff is what I usually think about. Its usually on my toilet seat where I dive deep inside and find reasons for everything I do and feel.

After reflecting on the completions of my past resolutions, I got curious as to why do we fail to hold onto them? And I think I found a reason. We fail because the things we set as the goals for the year are the things we think we want but not what we need! This resolution thing is just to force ourselves to do something we think we should do. Because otherwise if, for instance, I needed to learn French for a dream job/college, I wouldn’t have waited for the New Year. I would have enrolled for classes ASAP!

4 days have passed and how far have I reached? To be honest, I did not meet my own expectations. I got Breaking Bad and Suits series from my friend the same day my exams got over. There is no development about the getting slim scene. College hasn’t started so no comments about academics. But yes I have enrolled for JAVA classes.

This made me realize, The things we feel strongly about, we will never wait to get started with them.

I liked programming from the start and learning JAVA was also essential for getting a good internship, which I am really interested in. That is why it was probably the first thing I did, taking care of that part of my resolution.

So I am not worried about anything else now. I will do whatever I feel the need of. So no New Year resolution crap for me from now on-wards. This might not be true for anyone else, but do I care about that? Works for me.

And now I am hoping that I feel the need of performing better in college, and soon!